WWE Extreme Rules 2015 Review

Dean Ambrose defeated Luke Harper in a Chicago Street Fight

Early in the match, Ambrose and Harper hit each other with kendo sticks and Harper suplexed Ambrose through a chair. The match went to the back, ending up near one of the building’s exists. Harper got in a car to drive away and Ambrose jumped in the window as the car was heading out of the building. There was no finish at this point and the fans didn’t like that too much. There were loud boos and a “CM Punk” chant.

Ambrose and Harper came back during The New Day’s post-match interview. Ambrose took out New Day with a dive. The match went back to the ring, where Ambrose and Harper threw in a bunch of chairs. Ambrose ended up buried under chairs by Harper, who was going for a dive onto them. Ambrose got up and threw Harper onto the chairs. After Harper got up, Ambrose hit Dirty Deeds for the win.

I didn’t care for the idea of having Ambrose and Harper leave in the middle of the match, although I will give them points for creativity. The match itself was fine, but if this is what WWE calls “extreme,” they would perhaps be better off by not having an entire show revolve around matches with extreme stipulations. All that was used in this match was chairs, kendo sticks, and what looked like a piece of PVC pipe. ★★¼

Dolph Ziggler defeated Sheamus in a Kiss Me Arse Match

Early in the match, there was a cool spot where Sheamus went to throw Ziggler into steps, Ziggler jumped onto steps, and hit Sheamus with a tornado DDT off the steps. Other than that, this match sucked. Ziggler tried his best, as he always does, and he is no way to blame for this match being terrible. Sheamus, who was the target of many “You look stupid” chants from the Chicago crowd, is. I could count on one hand the number of moves Sheamus did in this match. Ziggler looked like an idiot for most of this match, more than once being unable to get Sheamus, who, while bigger than Ziggler, is not exactly Andre the Giant, off his feet. Ziggler ended up winning with a roll-up, at which point Sheamus began to deny that he was pinned for a count of three, insisting it was only two. After way too much time spent with Sheamus trying to avoid kissing Ziggler’s butt as per the stipulation of this train wreck, he hit Ziggler with a low blow, then shoved Ziggler’s face into his butt, and never kissed Ziggler’s. Ziggler won and still looked like a gigantic loser. Ziggler may want to consider going to Lucha Underground in the hopes that Chavo would take him back as his caddy. At this point, it would be massive step up for his career. -★★★¾

The New Day (Represented by Big E and Kofi Kingston) defeated Cesaro and Tyson Kidd to win the WWE Tag Team Championship

The match started with Kofi and Kidd doing nice chain wrestling, then Kofi tagged in Big E and Kidd responded by tagging in Cesaro. Cesaro displayed his strength by catching Big E, coming off the ropes, in mid-air and then body slamming him. This was awesome. Shortly after, Cesaro tagged in Kidd, and the pair stomped Big E in the corner to the beat of the crowd chant of “New Day sucks.” This was also awesome.

The finish came when Cesaro swung Kofi and Kidd dropkicked Kofi while he was being swung. Cesaro went for the pin, but Xavier Woods distracted the referee. Natalya then slapped Xavier. Big E knocked Kidd off the ring apron, then Cesaro sent Big E over the top rope, and finally Kofi rolled up Cesaro and grabbed the tights to get the pinfall.

I didn’t care for the finish, as it was a bit overdone, but otherwise, this was a great match. ★★★★¾

John Cena defeated Rusev in a Russian Chain Match to retain the WWE United States Championship

Cena was booed out of the building. He and Rusev brawled. This was a slow match. The crowd chanted “We love Lana”, Lana got on the apron and waved, so Rusev sent her to the back. Both guys went for submissions. In a chain match. No, I’m not kidding. This was stupid.

At one point, both Cena and Rusev had hit three corners, then Cena hit the AA on Rusev, allowing him to touch the final corner and retain the title. Rusev could have won this match without Cena having to be pinned, or lost without looking dumb. But no, they have to make Rusev lose and look like a complete idiot for the third PPV in a row. -★★

Nikki Bella defeated Naomi to retain the WWE Divas Championship

This was slow. Naomi got the heat on Nikki. Brie Bella was wearing a flannel cap, I have no idea why, but as a result, we got a riveting discussion from the Three Stooges seated at ringside about what a lumberjack does – cut down trees or hunt for Bigfoot. Naomi ended up on the ropes and the referee pulled Nikki away. While the ref’s back was turned, Brie kicked Naomi, so I guess nobody was the babyface here. JBL called it a Yeti kick. Nikki then hit the Rack Attack on Naomi for the win. -★½

Roman Reigns defeated The Big Show in a Jesus Christ, Not Again Match Last Man Standing Match

To the surprise of nobody, this match was slow. Also, it was boring. Reigns and Big Show put each other through tables. That was at least kind of fun. At one point, with Reigns down, the crowd chanted “You still got it” at Big Show. I don’t know if they hate Reigns that much of if they were beings sarcastic, but in either case, it was great. The crowd also chanted for JBL. You know a match is going great when the crowd starts chanting for the commentators. Reigns speared Big Show through the barricade, then jumped off the steps and speared Big Show through the Spanish announce table. Big Show got back up, then fell again, then Reigns flipped the English announce table on him to keep him down for the count of 10. -★★¼

Seth Rollins defeated Randy Orton to retain the WWE World Heavyweight Championship

The match started out with back-and-forth brawling and escape attempts. At one point we saw a neat spot where Rollins was almost out of the cage, but Orton pulled him back in and hit a superplex. The finish came when Orton attempted to walk out of the cage, but the gatekeeper, Kane, wouldn’t open door. Rollins went to kick Orton, Orton moved, and the door went into Kane. Of course, it makes perfect sense to kick someone into the door. Anyway, Kane hit both Rollins and Orton with door. Kane entered the cage and J&J Security followed. Kane chokeslammed J&J Security, Orton, and Rollins. He then rolled Rollins onto Orton. Orton kicked out. Orton RKO’d Kane, then Rollins RKO’d Orton and rolled out of the cage to retain the title. So there were two RKOs in a match where the RKO was banned. Nobody, including the announcers, were sure who the “RKO is banned” stipulation applied to or how it applied to them. This was a horrible finish, typical of WWE. Nothing made sense, the steel cage didn’t keep anyone out, and the stipulations didn’t matter. The rest of the match was fine, but didn’t make up for this numbskullery. -★¼

Overall, I thought this show was awful. The tag match was great, the best match WWE has seen in a long time. The street fight was okay. The rest of the show was bad. -★★½

Maybe WWE will get better once Qwan is there. He’s trying to get on Tough Enough. Check out his audition tape here.

Twitter: @KSchroeder2325

E-mail: schroeder.giig@gmail.com

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