What’s Going On Is Ready For Some Football

I mean get ready

ESPN is bringing Hank Williams, Jr. back for the opening to Monday Night Football. Williams was let go in 2011 when he said on an episode of Fox and Friends that then Speaker of the House John Boehner playing golf with President Barack Obama was like Adolf Hitler playing golf with Benjamin Netanyahu, Prime Minister of Israel. What anyone with half a brain would have done after that is recognize the abject stupidity of that statement an issue a sincere apology, but that’s at least half a brain more than Bocephus (and, frankly, at least two-thirds of the south as a whole) has, so Hank did not do that and ESPN dropped him, at which point Hank issued the obligatory “you can’t fire me, I quit” statement. He probably could have been asking us if we’re ready for football for a while now if he had simply issued that apology, because a quick game of “Should I Care What This Person Thinks?” yields a resounding “no.” It was an idiotic statement on an idiotic show on an idiotic network made by an idiot whose only skill was trading off his dad’s name until the late ’80s, when he added a second trick to his repertoire and re-wrote one of his songs to be about football. Admittedly, that second trick is a pretty good one, so I move that we let Hank do that trick and then go back to ignoring him for the other 10077 minutes of the week.

They were gonna go after John Wooden, but couldn’t quite figure out how to reanimate him

Thad Matta resigned as basketball coach at Ohio State and their wish list is a doozy:

Insider says OSU wish list includes:
Brad Stevens, Tony Bennett, Jay Wright, Sean Miller & Billy Donovan.

— Clay Hall (@claywsyx6) June 5, 2017

Brad Stevens went to the Eastern Conference Finals this year and has the #1 pick in the draft. He was completely unrealistic for Indiana, who has much more history in basketball and whose program isn’t a second banana to football. For OSU, he’s even more unrealistic than actually reanimating Wooden. The rest of the list is only slightly more realistic. In any case, this is going to be a major uphill battle for the Buckeyes, as Matta wasn’t recruiting well prior to stepping down and hiring a new coach in June certainly won’t help that.

GoFundUs

After “More Than Mean,” a video where female sports personalities had men read mean tweets people had sent to them to their faces won a Peabody award, Julie DiCaro, the biggest buffoon at a radio station full of them, started a GoFundMe to pay for her trip to accept the award. And people actually gave her the money. This is the point where I feel compelled to point out that in addition to being on the radio, DiCaro is a former lawyer and current wife of a lawyer. The GoFundMe was absolutely shameless. She topped that with a GoFundMe for her podcast “Burn It All Down.” I’m not linking to the show because I don’t hate my readers. If you hate yourself and actually want to listen to it, it’s not hard to find. The show is her and two other women doing their “everyone’s horrible but us” schtick. One of her co-hosts actually posted the GoFundMe, but it doesn’t make it any less shameless. It does, however, give me a great idea, so today, I’d like to announce the formation of the Good If It Goes Give Us Money Because Reasons Fund. You can PayPal to my email listed at the bottom of the page or buy GIIG merchandise. There’s a link above this section. I’ll put a second one here. If anybody actually does give us anything, it will be put to good use, like audio equipment and editing software to get a podcast going here and whatever other expenses that pop up as we try to grow the site. Plus, Qwan’s going to California for school and Prentiss has another kid on the way. If you have a kid on the way, buy a GIIG onesie! Link to the store is here!

Twitter: @KSchroeder_312

E-mail: schroeder.giig@gmail.com